Are You Tired Of Getting Beat Up By Love?

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Tired of getting beat up by love?

Then let it go. Consider it a Love TKO.

Those are the words of Teddy Pendergrass. No truer words were ever spoken about relationships gone bad. “Let it Go”. Take the ass whopping and keep it moving. Don’t hang around and keep taking the beatings. If you do, then maybe your more broken the person committing the abuse.

No one would attempt to drive a car with three flat tires, because they know that such a car wouldn’t go anywhere. Yet many people try to drive a relationship that has three, something four flat tires.

A relationship that is totally broken down and going nowhere. When all the air and all of the love has been let out of the relationship, it will be flat lined, dead,then its time to scrap it.

There are some cases that might be worth saving and other that should be exited with the speed of a gazelle running for it’s life. Love isn’t supposed to be painful. People don’t have to hurt each other in the name of love, that is a choice that is consciously made.

Considering that there are so many ways to love someone in moments of stress and strife, resorting to abuse is the cowardly way. Abuse of any form is the lowest form of communication, it’ barbaric and in humane. Physical abuse is the worst of all.

If your being knocked out by love, that isn’t love, that’s something else and you are calling it love. Love don’t love nobody and love don’t hurt nobody.

Don’t blame love for your bad judgement.

Kill Your Past Before It Kills You

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Kill Your Past Before It Kills You

What would happen if you drove you car and spent most of that time looking in the rear view mirror?

First of all it would take you a long time to get where your going. You wouldn’t be able to move very fast either. Secondly you there is a high probability that you would constantly have accidents. And lastly when your looking in the rear view mirror, your checking to see what’s going on behind you, trying to make sure there isn’t anything to worry about, which causes you to worry and be fearful.

It’s clear to see that navigating your car form the rear view mirror would not yield the optimal results of driving. It’s safe to say that the same thing applies to life. Navigating your life based on your past wont yield your optimal results.

Therefore you must Kill your past before it kills you.

There is absolutely nothing you can do to change the past..

Live in the moment, now is all there is.

Is your past killing your or simply slowing you down?

Money can’t fill an empty heart

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Money can’t fix a broken heart. It seem like most people in America believe the money, above all other things, will make the biggest difference in their lives.The “American Dream” is based upon having more money than one needs.

Yes, Money can patch up holes in your house. Money can also easily fix a hole in your car, but no amount of money can fix a hole in your heart.

Yes, Money does bring comfort and a false sense of security, but money doesn’t create happiness and peace.

Money isn’t real.

If all money in the world disappeared today, only humans would be impacted. The rest of the living creatures of the world would be just fine.This is because humans have been conditioned to believe that money is needed to survive.

When you’re laid up in the hospital, your bank account won’t come visit you.Nurture your relationship, love people, not money.

You can’t turn a moth into a butterfly

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We all make bad choices; some of us make more than others.
Bad choices make great stories and yield life lessons.
 
What’s worst than making a lousy choice? Staying in it longer than necessary.
 
If you get into a dissatisfactory relationship, how long you stay in it is more impactful to your life than the fact that you got in it in the first place.
 
The next time you make a poor choice, learn your lesson and move on.
 
Don’t waste time trying to turn a moth into a butterfly.

Start Your Someday Life Today

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What does your someday life look like? I imagine it looks amazing, at worst it looks better than your current life. Your someday life is the one you will get to someday, when conditions are better or different. Your someday life is the one you want, but don’t have the time and money for. Your someday life may seem like it only exist in some distant future, and that may be true. You can start working on it now.

Start working on it now and work on it everyday. Then before you know it, your someday life will be your everyday life.

Let me know what your someday life looks like, leave a comment starting with “Someday I want to….”. Then start working on that someday, today.

Here are a few of mine:
Someday I will be in excellent shape.
Someday I will have a successful business.
Someday I will write a book.

I’m working on all of these things now. My someday life is creeping up on me.

Why I walk 5 miles a day.

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My first 21 Day New Habit Challenge

 

Today marks the 22nd day in a row that I have walked 5 miles a day. This was my first new habit challenge. I am proud of my self for sticking to my commitment, no matter what. I walked in the rain. I walked in the cold. I walked at night. I walked when I was tired. I even walked when I was sick.

No matter how I felt before my walk, I felt better afterwards, every time. This is part of how it becomes a new habit. Not only by doing it everyday, but also from the enjoyment and benefits I get from walking.

I now know my neighborhood pretty well. I have been in most of the coffee shops around here and met new friends. I used my walking time as a meditative period. I listened to hours and hours of personal development material.

When I first started the walking it was a challenge, 21 days later, I look forward to doing it. I enjoy it, I actually want to do it. I’m truly excited about walking 5 miles. This has inspired me to create more new habits.

Good habits are easy to develop if you have will and desire and little help from some friends. Once you get started, your attitude will shift and you will find the difficult to be easy.

You Don’t Understand Me.

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How has your life been impacted by you not feeling understood? How many times have you gotten upset because you thought you weren’t understood? How many times have you had to explain yourself over and over again to someone because they didn’t seem to get your point of view? How many times have you gotten into arguments with someone simply because they didn’t understand your view?

This is my story, this is my song, and I know that I’m not alone. I can’t tell you how often I feel misunderstood. Feeling misunderstood has had a major impact on my life.

I enjoy the company of those who get me I don’t want to spend much time with those who make wrong all the time because they disagree. People who agree with me are way more fun to be with.

This was how it was for me for so long. Then one day I realized two things that changed my feeling of being understood.

First I realized that I was letting what others thought about me determine my reaction. When what I should be doing is responding to them based upon who I say I am.

When I’m responding to others based upon my commitment to life vs. reacting to what they think, I always come out better.

Secondly I realized that it’s better to first understand others, than it is to try and have them get you. There is a quote that goes “Seek to understand, before being understood”.

When I make a gracious effort to understand the wants and needs of others before mine, things tend to work out better. I experience a lot more friction when I’m trying to get my point across than when I’m trying to get their point.Now I seldom feel misunderstood and on the few occasions where I do, it really isn’t a big deal.

Be the change you want to see in the world.If you want others to understand you, you must first understand them.

 

All You Need Is ALF

ALF, Alf, 1986-90, © Alien Productions / Courtesy: Everett Collection

All you need is ALF, ALF is all you need and you need a lot of it. Everything you got 100% of it. Acceptance and forgiveness are both a big part of Love. Acceptance and forgiveness are nesscarry to experience 100% Love

When you love someone, yet never accept them where they are, as they are, there are limits to your love. It’s the same result if you never forgive yourself and others. You will never reach 100% of your love.

Unconditional love is 100% love. It’s what you get when two people come together to fully love and accept each other and forgive each other when they are not loving and accepting. Unconditional love is the highest form of love.

People want to be ACCEPTED, LOVED AND FORGIVEN. (ALF)

Try this one for a few weeks and I bet it will change your life forever.

Choose to accept everyone for everything they are and everything they are not. Don’t make anyone wrong because they disagree with you. Try to see it their way. Make an effort to suspend your perspective and view every experience from the eyes of others. Play a game called everybody is right, and figure out how to make everyone right.

Take on being the source of love in all of your relationships. I will never understand how there are so many people that wait on the world to present them with the love they desire. It sounds a bit like this. “When my husband treats me like a Queen, I will treat him like a King”. A better context might be “I will treat my man like a King, because I am a Queen” or “I will treat my man as the king he is. This works just as well the other way around, where the man is saying this about the woman.

Instead of waiting for someone to generate the love you want, you bring the love to the relationship. Keep bringing the love to the relationship. Do all things in love, do all things in peace.

Then on the rare occasions when love and acceptance aren’t present, causing people to get upset and or hurt. All must be forgiven and forgotten, never to be spoken of again. Imagine that! It takes a tremendous amount of courage and love to forgive others.

You’re probably saying that you don’t posses that amount of love and courage. Start forgiving, accepting and loving everyone and you will develop it. You will soon discover how good it feels to truly forgive others. Every time I forgive someone, I’m amazed at how better I feel.

I came up with and take away acronym, ALF whens stands for Accept, Love and Forgive.

If you live your life by the ALF system, peace and happiness shall soon be yours.

Happiness is an Inside Job

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Happiness is an Inside Job.

I just got off the phone with a friend named April, she has ben going through a tough time with her fiancé. For the past six month April has had to share her man with another woman. The side chic is taking over and it is driving her bat Sh*t Crazy.

For April, this is hell; she has become obsessed with this situation. She can’t think of anything else right now. She is so afraid that she is about to loose everything, her home, her job, her man and her mind. April’s Fiancé is now in a full-blown relationship with the side chic.

He says that he wants to keep them both. April’s default response is “Ain’t nobody got time for that”, but she stays and tries to compromise. She just can’t do it. April is unable the watch the man she had planned on marring, be all lovey dovey with the side chic. The Breakdown begins.

Last night April and me talked and she was full swing in “F*%K It” mode about her relationship. Saying things like “He don’t give a fuck about Me.” and “I really don’t want to go home.” She was pissed off and she was planning her escape. I can relate to what she is going through, I have had my heart broken some many times that I stopped keeping track. I advised her to jump off the Titanic, “Your relationship is sinking, JUMP”.

Then I called her today to check on her, and make sure she made it through the night without altercation”. Well when she answered the phone I was startled by how good she sounded. Her voice had a high tone of joy and laughter that I hadn’t heard from her in quite some time. She was giggly and upbeat. This was not the person that I was on the phone with the night before.

Before I could ask her why she was so elated, she told me. Her man had shifted his attention and love back to her, for the first time in months. She told me that he asked her to spend the day with him and he told how she was pretty. Then they topped it off with some make up sex.

She told me that she was so happy right now and it was apparent. This got me to thinking, which is why I’m writing this post. I wanted to know what actually took place inside of her mind that caused such a massive shift so fast. How could she go from being upset and done with her fiancé to being happy in love like a first time teenager?

The shift that made the difference came from with her. The few words and common action from her fiancé was just a trigger. they did not make the difference. April chose to view her circumstances differently and that made the difference.

Here’s what became clear to me at the moment that I observed this, it’s not what happens to you, it’s what you do with it.

What do you make it mean and how do you react. You can give a persons behavior a good or bad rating. You can over react or under react.

April, at any time could have chosen to leave or stay. She and she only is in control of her happiness. She just doesn’t know it. She believes that she has to wait for others to act for her to determine how she feels.

Stop waiting for the world to change, you be the change in the world you want to see. You be the change in your relationship. You be the change on your job. You be the change I your family. You be the change in your community.

If you want to be happy, then be happy. Say this to your self-everyday

“If it’s to be it’s up to me”